Look, I get it, we don’t want people whipping their cocks out and pissing all over everything, but do we want to see signs like this everywhere?

My next-door neighbor once put a little cutout of a dog, hunched over, squeezing out a deuce on her front lawn because I guess someone was letting their dog shit on her lawn. I never noticed, but you know what I did notice? The vulgar little picture of a dog in mid-shit planted in her lawn.

Is that a worthy trade-off? Is it better to have to look at a picture of a dog shitting every time you walk past the house than it is to occasionally see a pile of shit on the lawn? I mean, the shit will eventually go away, decompose, but the sign will always be there. Is that the kind of world we want to live in?

Wouldn’t it be better to simply build public restrooms for people to pee in rather than posting signs with pictures of men pissing on them all over our public spaces? For fucks sake, the sign on a men’s room door doesn’t show a picture of a guy pissing.

All I’m saying is that rather than nag people about their natural bodily functions, give them a place to do what they gotta do, and save the walls for the kind of art we might actually want to look at.